#BaxtersBuzz
Song of the Day - "All I Do" by Stevie Wonder. Pound for pound, Stevie may be the greatest artist of all time. Songwriter and performer who introduced new sounds to our world. Stevie has an appropriate song for every mood imaginable. This has nothing to do with him being born in Michigan either! As I was playing some music the other day, Zara asked me to add this to her playlist. Realizing that she technically didn't have her own playlist, I went to work and started to create one. Growing up, we had an 8-Track cassette player. We had Michael Jackson's Off The Wall and Songs in the Key of Life by Stevie Wonder. That was it! The closest thing we had to a playlist was the radio LOL. My daughter asked me to put the blue-tooth speaker in the bathroom while she took a bath the other day. I had to listen to Stevie in the living room! Regardless of the way the music is played, good music still remains. Wishing everyone a wonderful day.
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Tuesday, May 12, 2020
Song of the Day - "All I Do" by Stevie Wonder. Pound for pound, Stevie may be the greatest artist of all time. Songwriter and performer who introduced new sounds to our world. Stevie has an appropriate song for every mood imaginable. This has nothing to do with him being born in Michigan either! As I was playing some music the other day, Zara asked me to add this to her playlist. Realizing that she technically didn't have her own playlist, I went to work and started to create one. Growing up, we had an 8-Track cassette player. We had Michael Jackson's Off The Wall and Songs in the Key of Life by Stevie Wonder. That was it! The closest thing we had to a playlist was the radio LOL. My daughter asked me to put the blue-tooth speaker in the bathroom while she took a bath the other day. I had to listen to Stevie in the living room! Regardless of the way the music is played, good music still remains. Wishing everyone a wonderful day.
Monday, May 11, 2020
Untitled 5.11.2020
#BaxtersBuzz
We should have known that after our Mother's Day miracle, that the rest of the day would be a challenge. Bryce woke up around 5am and in his mind, he was up for the day. He pointed out that the sun was coming out and he wasn't sleepy anymore. I tried to explain to my 4 year that it was Mother's Day and it was very important that he got his rest and let mommy get hers. He (eventually) went back to sleep and stayed asleep until close to 10am. I'm not sure what happens in your house, but we're excited to have kids sleep until 8. Bryce proceeded to give us hell the rest of the day...but he did allow us to sleep in. Thanks Bryce LOL
Song of the Day - Untitled 05|09.21.2014 by Kendrick Lamar. The frustration that Kendrick does such a great job tapping into has been one of his calling cards. Kendrick seems to be working through a lot of things and shares with us his unfinished thoughts. "See I'm living with anxiety, ducking the sobriety" is a simple line, but is very telling. There have been many days during this quarantine that I am looking forward to turning on my music once my work day was over, and pouring myself a drink. If I'm being honest, it didn't start since I've been stuck in the house though. There are times that the only solution that I can think of is to temporarily separate from whatever monkey is on my back. This is why I write. So that I can feel connected to the thoughts that I attempt to suppress. It can be difficult to face, but it is healthy. After that drink, smoke, or whatever you do to duck your sobriety, you still have to look in the mirror and deal with you. Don't let your extracurricular activities become a crutch.
Crucial Conversations - There are times when we allow someone's words or actions to ruin our mood. This may extend for a day or even longer. Why don't we express our feelings to those people in a manner that inspires them to change? Why does it have to be confrontational, passive aggressive, or withdrawal so often? I have an important meeting today with my boss and I have been dreading it! I've been conflicted about how to address a problem that I have. As I write this, I realize what I must do. And it should be applied to anyone that you have a relationship with. Explain to them how their actions make you feel. Start there and allow them an opportunity to respond. The hope is that a respectful and productive conversation can come from it. This won't always be the case, but acting solely out of emotion is typically not going to produce the best results. I don't have an issue with displaying composure, but when I feel like my respectful and composed approach isn't be heard that's when my frustration sets in.
Talking VS. Communicating - Communication isn't how composed you are though. It isn't how well you articulate your thoughts. It isn't even the words that you use. It is how you convey your messages to your audience at the time. Always start with composure and try to remain there, but don't be afraid to show emotion. As long as you're be respectful and getting across the message that you want to communicate. Or what good is it? There's an argument to be made that that occasionally (that doesn't mean ALL the time) you need to step outside of yourself to let folks know you're not to be abused. You're nobody's punching bag or doormat. How well you're able to communicate will play a large part in what your future looks like.
Read more. Learn more. Change the globe.
We should have known that after our Mother's Day miracle, that the rest of the day would be a challenge. Bryce woke up around 5am and in his mind, he was up for the day. He pointed out that the sun was coming out and he wasn't sleepy anymore. I tried to explain to my 4 year that it was Mother's Day and it was very important that he got his rest and let mommy get hers. He (eventually) went back to sleep and stayed asleep until close to 10am. I'm not sure what happens in your house, but we're excited to have kids sleep until 8. Bryce proceeded to give us hell the rest of the day...but he did allow us to sleep in. Thanks Bryce LOL
Song of the Day - Untitled 05|09.21.2014 by Kendrick Lamar. The frustration that Kendrick does such a great job tapping into has been one of his calling cards. Kendrick seems to be working through a lot of things and shares with us his unfinished thoughts. "See I'm living with anxiety, ducking the sobriety" is a simple line, but is very telling. There have been many days during this quarantine that I am looking forward to turning on my music once my work day was over, and pouring myself a drink. If I'm being honest, it didn't start since I've been stuck in the house though. There are times that the only solution that I can think of is to temporarily separate from whatever monkey is on my back. This is why I write. So that I can feel connected to the thoughts that I attempt to suppress. It can be difficult to face, but it is healthy. After that drink, smoke, or whatever you do to duck your sobriety, you still have to look in the mirror and deal with you. Don't let your extracurricular activities become a crutch.
Crucial Conversations - There are times when we allow someone's words or actions to ruin our mood. This may extend for a day or even longer. Why don't we express our feelings to those people in a manner that inspires them to change? Why does it have to be confrontational, passive aggressive, or withdrawal so often? I have an important meeting today with my boss and I have been dreading it! I've been conflicted about how to address a problem that I have. As I write this, I realize what I must do. And it should be applied to anyone that you have a relationship with. Explain to them how their actions make you feel. Start there and allow them an opportunity to respond. The hope is that a respectful and productive conversation can come from it. This won't always be the case, but acting solely out of emotion is typically not going to produce the best results. I don't have an issue with displaying composure, but when I feel like my respectful and composed approach isn't be heard that's when my frustration sets in.
Talking VS. Communicating - Communication isn't how composed you are though. It isn't how well you articulate your thoughts. It isn't even the words that you use. It is how you convey your messages to your audience at the time. Always start with composure and try to remain there, but don't be afraid to show emotion. As long as you're be respectful and getting across the message that you want to communicate. Or what good is it? There's an argument to be made that that occasionally (that doesn't mean ALL the time) you need to step outside of yourself to let folks know you're not to be abused. You're nobody's punching bag or doormat. How well you're able to communicate will play a large part in what your future looks like.
Read more. Learn more. Change the globe.
Sunday, May 10, 2020
Mama's Gun (Time's A Wastin)
#BaxtersBuzz
As I sit here deciding what to write. My brain tells me, "Just go!" This is the morning of Mother's Day and we are still under quarantine. I'm thinking back to last night and the Erykah Badu and Jill Scott battle.... as I battle allergy season, a newfound (not really new) anxiety, and the weight of this work/home balance. The more confident I become in my role at work, the less comfortable it seems to make others. We're all technically in the same boat, but definitely rowing in different directions. I am not above criticism though. My ego starts to flare up and I believe in my direction and doubt others and their plans for the company's future. Then I realize that I have some important decisions to make about my future.
Song of the Day - "Time's A Wasting" by Erykah Badu. On Mother's Day, it makes sense to select a song from Badu's second studio project, Mama's Gun. She warns that, "time's wasting. Don't you take your time young man. Keep on drifting ain't no telling where you'll land." If my mother was alive when I reached my twenties, I imagine her sharing similar sentiments with me. This album was released at the end of 2000 while I was on the heels of 21 and wondering what was next for me. I tried to convince some of my friends to move out of the country. They looked at me like I was crazy! LOL. I was unsettled and I felt like nothing was really keeping me near home. Part of me wishes that I would have taken my chance out on my own and went to Paris (not sure why that was my choice but that would've been dope!). I settled on a few hours west, to Kalamazoo, Michigan.
Wifey - As I think about foundations, nobody has provided a stronger one for me than my wife. Some of the un-calculated risks that I surely would have taken if she wasn't in the picture, I avoided (whew!). Although I still feel a bit unsettled on occasion, I am so thankful for her and our kids for keeping me grounded in reality. We're figuring out this shit on the fly, and I can't think of anyone I'd rather be experiencing this crazy life with. Love you Mae!
Queens - A special shout out to the women who have played motherly roles in my life at one time or another: All of my older sisters have always provided me with a place to lay my head, a home-cooked meal, and a safe place to vent about things. We share a father so there were private gripes of mine that nobody else knew about. My mother-in-law has always been in my corner and supportive as well. I love her dearly. There are others who have given me a piece of advice here or there, offered perspective, and instilled confidence when my well seemed dry. You never know who God has called to subtly redirect you. The last angel that I can think of (I'm sure there have been more) was a cashier from TJ Maxx back in 2017. I was at a real crossroads in my life and our 5 minute conversation while I was checking out helped me immensely! She was going through a tough time herself and as I offered words of advice, I realized that my issues weren't so bad.
Back to Wifey - Let me just say this: It wasn't a slam dunk that I would do anything very well when she met me. I had the potential, but so do many others. She loved me for me, because I didn't have much else to offer LOL. I think about that often and work to provide a lifestyle and environment that feels secure and settled for us all. Many of our new neighbors are where we aspire to be: They've already raised their children and now their grandchildren are the ages that our kids are now! Since this is our second financial crisis of our adult life, I'm not certain about the future. What I am certain of is that I will do my very best and with God's help we'll be alright.
Happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers in the world. And all of the women who are helping to shape the lives of those around them. Whether they know it or not.
As I sit here deciding what to write. My brain tells me, "Just go!" This is the morning of Mother's Day and we are still under quarantine. I'm thinking back to last night and the Erykah Badu and Jill Scott battle.... as I battle allergy season, a newfound (not really new) anxiety, and the weight of this work/home balance. The more confident I become in my role at work, the less comfortable it seems to make others. We're all technically in the same boat, but definitely rowing in different directions. I am not above criticism though. My ego starts to flare up and I believe in my direction and doubt others and their plans for the company's future. Then I realize that I have some important decisions to make about my future.
Song of the Day - "Time's A Wasting" by Erykah Badu. On Mother's Day, it makes sense to select a song from Badu's second studio project, Mama's Gun. She warns that, "time's wasting. Don't you take your time young man. Keep on drifting ain't no telling where you'll land." If my mother was alive when I reached my twenties, I imagine her sharing similar sentiments with me. This album was released at the end of 2000 while I was on the heels of 21 and wondering what was next for me. I tried to convince some of my friends to move out of the country. They looked at me like I was crazy! LOL. I was unsettled and I felt like nothing was really keeping me near home. Part of me wishes that I would have taken my chance out on my own and went to Paris (not sure why that was my choice but that would've been dope!). I settled on a few hours west, to Kalamazoo, Michigan.
Wifey - As I think about foundations, nobody has provided a stronger one for me than my wife. Some of the un-calculated risks that I surely would have taken if she wasn't in the picture, I avoided (whew!). Although I still feel a bit unsettled on occasion, I am so thankful for her and our kids for keeping me grounded in reality. We're figuring out this shit on the fly, and I can't think of anyone I'd rather be experiencing this crazy life with. Love you Mae!
Queens - A special shout out to the women who have played motherly roles in my life at one time or another: All of my older sisters have always provided me with a place to lay my head, a home-cooked meal, and a safe place to vent about things. We share a father so there were private gripes of mine that nobody else knew about. My mother-in-law has always been in my corner and supportive as well. I love her dearly. There are others who have given me a piece of advice here or there, offered perspective, and instilled confidence when my well seemed dry. You never know who God has called to subtly redirect you. The last angel that I can think of (I'm sure there have been more) was a cashier from TJ Maxx back in 2017. I was at a real crossroads in my life and our 5 minute conversation while I was checking out helped me immensely! She was going through a tough time herself and as I offered words of advice, I realized that my issues weren't so bad.
Back to Wifey - Let me just say this: It wasn't a slam dunk that I would do anything very well when she met me. I had the potential, but so do many others. She loved me for me, because I didn't have much else to offer LOL. I think about that often and work to provide a lifestyle and environment that feels secure and settled for us all. Many of our new neighbors are where we aspire to be: They've already raised their children and now their grandchildren are the ages that our kids are now! Since this is our second financial crisis of our adult life, I'm not certain about the future. What I am certain of is that I will do my very best and with God's help we'll be alright.
Happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers in the world. And all of the women who are helping to shape the lives of those around them. Whether they know it or not.
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