Baxter's Buzz
Sports is my reality TV. It helps me get through whatever I'm going through and takes my mind off of real things going on in my life. Those millionaires playing a game is pretty silly, don't you think? As I've gotten older, I haven't taken sports as seriously. I still love my local teams but perspective is a beautiful thing. Like today for instance, the Detroit "Stinkin".Lions loss another winnable game. Do you know how many times I've seen that shit? But I was able to spend the rest of my evening with my lovely wife and my baby girl. How can I be mad about millionaires playing a game when I'm watching my first born be the cutest baby on the planet? Slightly annoyed? Oh, for sure, but nothing more....well, most of the time.
Basketball has been so therapeutic for me over the years. When I was a teenager, thinking the world was going to end because of a girl, I was able to go to the park and let off some steam. I've been playing basketball again recently and it has helped me through some pretty tough times. There's nothing like playing a game you love. I had been away from the game for too long and I didn't always have the proper outlet for my competitive juices. Sometimes you have that pent up aggression with nowhere to direct it. I now feel more balanced.
There's enough seriousness in the world, and we're all big kids so sports brings our attention to something that isn't work or family. Just a little trash talking and an opportunity to enjoy teamwork at its finest (when you're winning).
As my friend and I walked out of the gym today, we asked another guy that we've been playing with if there was something wrong. He didn't seem like himself and he finally admitted that he had just attended his cousin's funeral yesterday. Then he said, "I came to the gym to get away from it and my mind off of things." It feels good to know that it isn't just me who can find peace, if only temporary, on the basketball court.
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Sunday, November 10, 2013
If I Could Go Back In Time
Baxter's Buzz
"Are you going to invite him to the party?" My wife asked me today. My reply was simply, "No."
She asked me was I done with him, but he's been done with me for quite some time. I try to put myself in the shoes of others and attempt to see things how they may be seeing them. Sometimes I am so rational, that it is difficult for me to get upset at others because I understand that we are all imperfect. I want to be mad and blame people for things that have happened to me, but most of the time I can't. And honestly, sometimes, it bugs the hell out of me!
I want to be mad because I've been a loyal friend to anyone I've ever called a friend and that hasn't always been reciprocated. I want to be mad because I've always been accessible and I can't even get certain people to answer their phone when I call. I want to be mad because some folks get amnesia when it comes to those who were there for them when they were going through issues. The have a selective memory and remember your shortcomings but they are afraid of a mirror.
I've gone through all sorts of ups and downs over the past couple of years and I would've liked to share those things with the people I've always shared moments with. I'm not afraid of a mirror. I don't always like what I see, but I never fool myself into thinking the truth is anything other than just that.
I wish I could go back in time and talk to my family, on my mother's and father's side and explain to them how important it is for me to stay connected once my mother passed. I wish I could tell them to share stories with me about her so that her memory would live on. I wish I could tell them to not be so effin selfish and to make time for me. Come and get me during the holidays to visit my mom's side of the family. I'd tell them that not talking about issues doesn't make them go away. Maybe they should've taken me to therapy. Maybe they could've just been present in my life.
But everyone had their own lives to deal with, right? Maybe they didn't know what to say to an eight year old whose life was turning upside down. And maybe instead of trying to work through those challenges, they decided to not even try. So as I look at my 6 month old daughter and think about the stories that I'll share with her, there will be many questions that she'll ask that I won't be able to answer. I hope that I'll be able to fill in some of those blanks between now and then. I want to rid myself of any resentment and continue to seek out family members to not only get some answers, but to reconnect. I cannot repeat their lack of effort on my behalf. I am now doing this for my family so my daughter will have a sense of her history.
If I could go back in time and talk to my family, I'd share my disappointment with their lack of a plan. I'd explain that taking someone's history is one of the worst things you can do to them. I'd then tell them that I'll become a winner and productive member of society, with or without their support, but I'd choose the former ten out of ten times. God has blessed me with strength, determination and a drive to succeed, against all odds. The friends that I no longer speak to were at one time, shoulders that I could lean on, taking the place of the family I never got a chance to learn and grow up with.
So that's why it's difficult for me to get upset. All of my experiences, good and bad, has gotten me to this place. And although my life is far from perfect, the challenges that I've faced has given me the confidence to know that I can overcome all sorts of obstacles. So instead of going back to chastise family members for their lack or interest or effort, I'd go and talk to myself. I'd tell myself to ask questions. To demand to see my family and to not take no for an answer. I'd try to explain to my eight year old brain that sometimes you're a better friend to others than they are to you, and that's okay. I'd tell myself that all people aren't meant to be in your life forever. So take the memories you've shared and the lessons you've learned while with them and consider yourself blessed to have had them in your life.
"Are you going to invite him to the party?" My wife asked me today. My reply was simply, "No."
She asked me was I done with him, but he's been done with me for quite some time. I try to put myself in the shoes of others and attempt to see things how they may be seeing them. Sometimes I am so rational, that it is difficult for me to get upset at others because I understand that we are all imperfect. I want to be mad and blame people for things that have happened to me, but most of the time I can't. And honestly, sometimes, it bugs the hell out of me!
I want to be mad because I've been a loyal friend to anyone I've ever called a friend and that hasn't always been reciprocated. I want to be mad because I've always been accessible and I can't even get certain people to answer their phone when I call. I want to be mad because some folks get amnesia when it comes to those who were there for them when they were going through issues. The have a selective memory and remember your shortcomings but they are afraid of a mirror.
I've gone through all sorts of ups and downs over the past couple of years and I would've liked to share those things with the people I've always shared moments with. I'm not afraid of a mirror. I don't always like what I see, but I never fool myself into thinking the truth is anything other than just that.
I wish I could go back in time and talk to my family, on my mother's and father's side and explain to them how important it is for me to stay connected once my mother passed. I wish I could tell them to share stories with me about her so that her memory would live on. I wish I could tell them to not be so effin selfish and to make time for me. Come and get me during the holidays to visit my mom's side of the family. I'd tell them that not talking about issues doesn't make them go away. Maybe they should've taken me to therapy. Maybe they could've just been present in my life.
But everyone had their own lives to deal with, right? Maybe they didn't know what to say to an eight year old whose life was turning upside down. And maybe instead of trying to work through those challenges, they decided to not even try. So as I look at my 6 month old daughter and think about the stories that I'll share with her, there will be many questions that she'll ask that I won't be able to answer. I hope that I'll be able to fill in some of those blanks between now and then. I want to rid myself of any resentment and continue to seek out family members to not only get some answers, but to reconnect. I cannot repeat their lack of effort on my behalf. I am now doing this for my family so my daughter will have a sense of her history.
If I could go back in time and talk to my family, I'd share my disappointment with their lack of a plan. I'd explain that taking someone's history is one of the worst things you can do to them. I'd then tell them that I'll become a winner and productive member of society, with or without their support, but I'd choose the former ten out of ten times. God has blessed me with strength, determination and a drive to succeed, against all odds. The friends that I no longer speak to were at one time, shoulders that I could lean on, taking the place of the family I never got a chance to learn and grow up with.
So that's why it's difficult for me to get upset. All of my experiences, good and bad, has gotten me to this place. And although my life is far from perfect, the challenges that I've faced has given me the confidence to know that I can overcome all sorts of obstacles. So instead of going back to chastise family members for their lack or interest or effort, I'd go and talk to myself. I'd tell myself to ask questions. To demand to see my family and to not take no for an answer. I'd try to explain to my eight year old brain that sometimes you're a better friend to others than they are to you, and that's okay. I'd tell myself that all people aren't meant to be in your life forever. So take the memories you've shared and the lessons you've learned while with them and consider yourself blessed to have had them in your life.
Friday, November 8, 2013
Only Love
Baxter's Buzz
Life takes some interesting turns. Looking back as I approach my 2 year anniversary at my latest job, I can clearly say that change is the only certainty in this world. I'm telling you, unpredictability, is a friend we better get acquainted with. He ain't going anywhere!
I've lost touch with two of my closest friends. Two people who know more about me than most, I've had minimum contact with recently. How does one explain something like that? No drama. No big blow up or argument. Sometimes, people grow apart and there is no clear-cut explanation. #Shrug
I've also made some friends in this same time-frame. And I've grown closer to some family recently. I also met the sweetest little girl in the world when my daughter was born. I am saddened by the change of events, but I rarely get a chance to think about it. My life is full, for sure. The past is what has shaped me, but I do not live there. I wonder what these next 12 months will bring. My plan is continue to spend time with those I care about. And let them know how special they are to me. No room in my heart for resentment, only love.
Life takes some interesting turns. Looking back as I approach my 2 year anniversary at my latest job, I can clearly say that change is the only certainty in this world. I'm telling you, unpredictability, is a friend we better get acquainted with. He ain't going anywhere!
I've lost touch with two of my closest friends. Two people who know more about me than most, I've had minimum contact with recently. How does one explain something like that? No drama. No big blow up or argument. Sometimes, people grow apart and there is no clear-cut explanation. #Shrug
I've also made some friends in this same time-frame. And I've grown closer to some family recently. I also met the sweetest little girl in the world when my daughter was born. I am saddened by the change of events, but I rarely get a chance to think about it. My life is full, for sure. The past is what has shaped me, but I do not live there. I wonder what these next 12 months will bring. My plan is continue to spend time with those I care about. And let them know how special they are to me. No room in my heart for resentment, only love.
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Thoughts for Today
| Baxter's Buzz Life is full of all sorts of surprises. It's exciting and nerve wrecking at the same time. Back in the day people stayed at jobs for 30-40 years until they retired. That's becoming less and less the case. It makes it tough to have that comfort level....especially in the world of sales. What can you do? Work hard and keep an update resume is a good start. Work drama will never end. I don't care where you work. I was exchanging stories with a friend of mine today, and there are wacky things going on from mom and pop shops, to fortune 100 companies. Wacky people in leadership roles and wacky people reporting to their wacky managers. And then you have to deal with different personality types. I believe, many times, that the manager you report to along with the actual work you do (and pay of course) determine how successful you'll be at a job. Some personalities just mesh well with all types of folks and then some others just have bad attitudes and a negative outlook. Those negative folks will always find it difficult to achieve happiness (life is tough enough when you're optimistic). These negative Nancy types are truly fighting an uphill battle. These sour faced-characters are walking around bringing the morale down in the office, one frown at a time. They don't understand how meaningful a simple smile could be to someone having a tough day. A simple hello or compliment can go a long way. |
Monday, August 19, 2013
Advantages of Having a Baby
16 weeks ago my wife and I had a baby girl. This is the most awesome feeling IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. Soon I'll blog about that whole experience, but for now I'm sharing a list of advantages of having a baby.
1. Taking weird family photos - I took the most awkward picture since I was in elementary school (I used to take every picture with my mouth open forever. Wish one of the photographers would have given me a heads up) with my wife and my newborn baby, posted it on Facebook and I only heard one comment about how bad the picture was (you know who you are).
2. Bad grammar - I'm not sure why "baby talk" was invented, but I'm pretty sure it's one of the worst inventions this side of the shake weight. "Wook at da wittle baby." Seriously? Who talks like that?? And then they wonder why their baby talks like Elmer Fud. Talk to them like regular people.....because they are regular people. They're just little.
3. Passive aggressiveness - Have you ever talked to your significant other through your baby? It's one of the quickest way to start an argument...Trust me. "So daddy was just gonna leave you poopy until I came back, huh?" What did you and mommy do all day? The house looks the same as when I left for work today." Even though you can do it, I'd advise against it.
4. Blame farts on the baby - Infants have some of the loudest farts around. Conceivably (pardon the pun), you could pass gas as loud as you possibly could and blame it on the baby. And depending on how gullible they are, your spouse could actually go for it. I wish you the best of luck with that one.
5. Leave engagements early (or get out of plans altogether) - Children are unpredictable. They get fussy, sick, and your plans can unravel quickly. Anyone who has kids are typically more understanding if you change plans suddenly or need to cancel. And if the people you are cancelling with DON'T have kids, you can believe that somebody with children will attempt to explain (and justify) your sudden change of plans. And if you are already at an event, you are one baby meltdown from excusing yourself and skating home early. Nobody wants a crying baby ruining the mood of a good party or gathering. They'll be glad to see you walk out of that door.
Shout out to K-Dubb for helping me with this list.
1. Taking weird family photos - I took the most awkward picture since I was in elementary school (I used to take every picture with my mouth open forever. Wish one of the photographers would have given me a heads up) with my wife and my newborn baby, posted it on Facebook and I only heard one comment about how bad the picture was (you know who you are).
2. Bad grammar - I'm not sure why "baby talk" was invented, but I'm pretty sure it's one of the worst inventions this side of the shake weight. "Wook at da wittle baby." Seriously? Who talks like that?? And then they wonder why their baby talks like Elmer Fud. Talk to them like regular people.....because they are regular people. They're just little.
3. Passive aggressiveness - Have you ever talked to your significant other through your baby? It's one of the quickest way to start an argument...Trust me. "So daddy was just gonna leave you poopy until I came back, huh?" What did you and mommy do all day? The house looks the same as when I left for work today." Even though you can do it, I'd advise against it.
4. Blame farts on the baby - Infants have some of the loudest farts around. Conceivably (pardon the pun), you could pass gas as loud as you possibly could and blame it on the baby. And depending on how gullible they are, your spouse could actually go for it. I wish you the best of luck with that one.
5. Leave engagements early (or get out of plans altogether) - Children are unpredictable. They get fussy, sick, and your plans can unravel quickly. Anyone who has kids are typically more understanding if you change plans suddenly or need to cancel. And if the people you are cancelling with DON'T have kids, you can believe that somebody with children will attempt to explain (and justify) your sudden change of plans. And if you are already at an event, you are one baby meltdown from excusing yourself and skating home early. Nobody wants a crying baby ruining the mood of a good party or gathering. They'll be glad to see you walk out of that door.
Shout out to K-Dubb for helping me with this list.
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Letter to TSH
Baxter's Buzz
Life changes, and sometimes quicker than a blink of an eye, and days turn into weeks fast. Then you realize that you haven't talked to one of your favorite people in the world for like, months.
I just want you to know that I am very proud of you and the woman you've become. You're wedding, I hate that we cannot attend. Just know that we are praying for you guys and I am excited for the life you two seem to be building together. No relationship is perfect, but you just keep working on it and do your best to demonstrate your love and appreciation for one another (I say this to you as I remind myself of the same thing).
I didn't know any married people when I was young besides Derrick and Lea. I remember everything seeming so perfect and effortless for them, at least that was my impression (This is me as a teenager who didn't spend a ton of time with them). I remember seeing them argue for the first time and it gave me hope that Crystal and I DID have a shot because we argued sometimea too...haha. I was like, "Well, this must be natural."
I'd like for us to spend more time together. I want to get to know Cortez better and spend time with Kennedy too. We're neighbors and I've been to your house one stinkin time! It's totally my fault though. When we were young do you know how excited we'd be if we knew that we'd both have little baby girls, be married and live 5 minutes from one another? What would make for a better script? You are weird, like me (maybe even more weird) and that doesn't always play out well for us. We have so much going on in our brain, dealing with who knows what, that picking up the phone can sometimes be difficult. I get lost in my mind for days at a time, thinking of so may people, yet reaching out to so few. That is on the list of about 2,593,552 other things that I need to work on, although very close to the top. Please know that I love you very much and always will.
Life changes, and sometimes quicker than a blink of an eye, and days turn into weeks fast. Then you realize that you haven't talked to one of your favorite people in the world for like, months.
I just want you to know that I am very proud of you and the woman you've become. You're wedding, I hate that we cannot attend. Just know that we are praying for you guys and I am excited for the life you two seem to be building together. No relationship is perfect, but you just keep working on it and do your best to demonstrate your love and appreciation for one another (I say this to you as I remind myself of the same thing).
I didn't know any married people when I was young besides Derrick and Lea. I remember everything seeming so perfect and effortless for them, at least that was my impression (This is me as a teenager who didn't spend a ton of time with them). I remember seeing them argue for the first time and it gave me hope that Crystal and I DID have a shot because we argued sometimea too...haha. I was like, "Well, this must be natural."
I'd like for us to spend more time together. I want to get to know Cortez better and spend time with Kennedy too. We're neighbors and I've been to your house one stinkin time! It's totally my fault though. When we were young do you know how excited we'd be if we knew that we'd both have little baby girls, be married and live 5 minutes from one another? What would make for a better script? You are weird, like me (maybe even more weird) and that doesn't always play out well for us. We have so much going on in our brain, dealing with who knows what, that picking up the phone can sometimes be difficult. I get lost in my mind for days at a time, thinking of so may people, yet reaching out to so few. That is on the list of about 2,593,552 other things that I need to work on, although very close to the top. Please know that I love you very much and always will.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Poems by Bax
Another Year Here
Another year here
Who said it couldn't be done?
We won. I'm doing my victory dance like Re-Run
But I've been what's happening
Sometimes I'm forgotten about
But give me a minute and I'll be back again
Who said it couldn't be done?
We won. I'm doing my victory dance like Re-Run
But I've been what's happening
Sometimes I'm forgotten about
But give me a minute and I'll be back again
Haters want to attack again
Ah, home sweet home
I used to say leave me alone now I'm begging you to stay
Cause when you go away, I'm probably standing with you
And that could never be my position for more than a day
Ah, home sweet home
I used to say leave me alone now I'm begging you to stay
Cause when you go away, I'm probably standing with you
And that could never be my position for more than a day
There's so much to do and our time is limited
Don't rush life, do your best to remember it
Don't rush life, do your best to remember it
Monday, April 15, 2013
My New Year 2013
| Baxter's Buzz So as I approach my 32nd birthday tomorrow, ironically, I'm fixated on when my first child will arrive (any day now) and what is expected of me for my wife's 30th birthday. I've been telling my wife that the only gift that I need is a healthy baby. Wifey's birthday is in June and I don't expect her to feel the same way. Turning 30 is one of those "milestone" birthdays so I get it. Just not sure what she's expecting because all of our money has gone to this future sweetest baby in the world. Because my birthday is on the work calendar, people feel completely comfortable asking me how old I'll be this year. I don't mind that question at all. The only issue I have is, the people who want to know my age are women. And Lord knows you cannot ask a woman their age. A little hypocritical, don't you think? There are some women that are proud to tell you their age. Typically, it's because they believe they look young for their age, they're in good shape for their age, or they feel accomplished for their age. I suppose it's a lot easier to brag about your age when you feel like you're on path to your dreams. I believe we all take stock and assess where we are in contrast to where we'd like to be. It's only natural. January 1 brings a certain amount of reflection, but I consider April 16 my new year. What plans do you have for the rest of this year? |
Sunday, April 14, 2013
One Year Ago
Baxter's Buzz
Last year today, a good friend of my family, and a great friend of mine passed away. Just two days prior to her birthday (which happens to be my birthday also). She would be so proud of how this past year has gone for me. She helped me develop my love of movies and taught me not to be afraid of wearing your heart on your sleeves (which I haven't followed in the slightest). She was intelligent, articulate, passionate and unable to be silenced. She loved hard and stuck to her guns when she felt strongly about something, regardless of if she believe she was right or not. I remember her being somewhat of a mother-figure for me when my mother passed away. She wasn't afraid to be herself with the understanding that everyone wouldn't accept that. That's one of the lessons I hope to pass along to my daughter.
Last year when my Aunt was sick, I told her that she couldn't go anywhere because our birthday was coming up soon. She agreed but I later realized she had to get up to heaven in order to work on getting my first born here. So as my birth month concludes, my first daughter will be born and I know that my aunt had something to do with it. I'm sure she was polite while also being extremely articulate and persistent in making her request known. The thought of the exchange makes me smile.
Siblings Day? - Last week people were celebrating something called "Sibling Day." I can honestly say that I've never heard of this before this year. Is this real? Although my dad had several children way before I was even thought of, I grew up by myself, and therefore consider myself an only child. I did spend A LOT of time with 10 or so of my closest friends and consider them my brothers. I guess I want to wish them a happy siblings day. Oh yeah, my sisters and my blood brother too.
Welcome To The Club - With our desire as humans to have an answer for every question and complete every sentence, we need a reason for other people's success. But we need an answer that WE can accept. "The girl who lost all of that weight HAS to be starving herself."
"He's a brown-noser and that's why HE got the promotion."
"That house is TOO nice for them. They must have purchased a foreclosure."
My advice to anyone achieving some success and consequently, obtaining some haters: Focus on what made you successful and don't worry about haters. And remember that a pat on the back ain't far from a kick in the behind. Folks are very fickle and may be rooting for your success one day and your demise the next.
Last year today, a good friend of my family, and a great friend of mine passed away. Just two days prior to her birthday (which happens to be my birthday also). She would be so proud of how this past year has gone for me. She helped me develop my love of movies and taught me not to be afraid of wearing your heart on your sleeves (which I haven't followed in the slightest). She was intelligent, articulate, passionate and unable to be silenced. She loved hard and stuck to her guns when she felt strongly about something, regardless of if she believe she was right or not. I remember her being somewhat of a mother-figure for me when my mother passed away. She wasn't afraid to be herself with the understanding that everyone wouldn't accept that. That's one of the lessons I hope to pass along to my daughter.
Last year when my Aunt was sick, I told her that she couldn't go anywhere because our birthday was coming up soon. She agreed but I later realized she had to get up to heaven in order to work on getting my first born here. So as my birth month concludes, my first daughter will be born and I know that my aunt had something to do with it. I'm sure she was polite while also being extremely articulate and persistent in making her request known. The thought of the exchange makes me smile.
Siblings Day? - Last week people were celebrating something called "Sibling Day." I can honestly say that I've never heard of this before this year. Is this real? Although my dad had several children way before I was even thought of, I grew up by myself, and therefore consider myself an only child. I did spend A LOT of time with 10 or so of my closest friends and consider them my brothers. I guess I want to wish them a happy siblings day. Oh yeah, my sisters and my blood brother too.
Welcome To The Club - With our desire as humans to have an answer for every question and complete every sentence, we need a reason for other people's success. But we need an answer that WE can accept. "The girl who lost all of that weight HAS to be starving herself."
"He's a brown-noser and that's why HE got the promotion."
"That house is TOO nice for them. They must have purchased a foreclosure."
My advice to anyone achieving some success and consequently, obtaining some haters: Focus on what made you successful and don't worry about haters. And remember that a pat on the back ain't far from a kick in the behind. Folks are very fickle and may be rooting for your success one day and your demise the next.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Silence is Golden
Baxter's Buzz
I've been thinking about this next chapter that I'm entering and how I'll adjust. God gives the baby 9 months to grow inside the womb and the parents 9 months to "prepare." I don't care if the room is painted, the books are read, the birth classes are completed and the stroller has been purchased, you ain't ready. With our first child on the way, there's definitely some uncertainty. For every person that wishes you well and tells you everything will be fine, there are 8 others telling you about lack of sleep and all of their other horror stories. Do you not think we know our sleeping has to change? People saying stuff like, "Get your sleep now," like we can stock up on it. I think sometimes people don't know what to say so they all say the same thing. It's the same reason people always talk about the weather when they see someone. But I encourage everyone to appreciate a little silence and shut up sometimes. |
Poems by Bax
Make A Mark
I ain't as street as the street dudes
Not as churchy as the church folks
They thought I was born to be a loser
Overlooked like Florida Gulf Coast
Now I'd like to propose a toast
To where I've been thus far
It always takes a little success
Before they act like they know who you are
And yes I'm far from a star
I'm just tryna do my part
Okay, I'm lying. I wanna make a mark!
I ain't as street as the street dudes
Not as churchy as the church folks
They thought I was born to be a loser
Overlooked like Florida Gulf Coast
Now I'd like to propose a toast
To where I've been thus far
It always takes a little success
Before they act like they know who you are
And yes I'm far from a star
I'm just tryna do my part
Okay, I'm lying. I wanna make a mark!
Monday, April 1, 2013
No Fooling Around
Baxter's Buzz
As I think about my 32nd birthday approaching, I've realized a few things.
I feel great. I've been eating much better (more or less) for over a year now. I could definitely use some more exercise, but I have been in much worse shape in the past.
My eyesight is worsening. I've gone from having 20/20 vision to getting my first pair of eyeglasses a few years back. Now I'm definitely in need of another eye exam.
My mind is sharp as ever. Over the years I've learned from about 957, 699 of my mistakes (that's a lowball number). I was blessed with a good feel for things. By things I mean people around me as well as the temperature of a room. I can't always see what's going on (if I don't have my glasses), but I can always feel it.
My circle is smaller. There are people who were in my life who no longer hold a place. I realized that I'd become very selfish, holding on to people because they are a part of my past and not because they play any significant role in my life now. As we get older, memories from childhood get pushed further and further back. It's awesome to reminisce about the good ole days, but it's also awesome to create memories today that will serve as the good ole days later. I appreciate the folks in my life now and all of the people that have spent time with me in these (almost) 32 years. Most things, good and bad, eventually come to an end. Just be ready for the new endeavors that are sure to approach.
Opening Day 2013
| Baxter's Buzz As baseball season starts tomorrow, I'm starting to get excited. Then I realized that I have goals to accomplish and those don't always coincide with watching TV. As a matter of fact, whenever I'm watching television, I'm typically not very productive. Don't get me wrong. I love my Tigers, Lions and Pistons (I also watch a decent amount of the Red Wings during their playoff run). Things have to be different moving forward because I am different. More reading and writing is an absolute a goal of mine and baseball presents my most difficult challenge this year because there's a game on every single day. My Detroit Tigers will play 162 games between now and the end of September. Until I start making money like some of those athletes, I will not allow myself to spend more time watching them make THEIR money than I spend time attempting to make mine. I'll be rooting for them, as always, but not as intensively as before. |
Monday, March 4, 2013
The Peanut Gallery
| Baxter's Buzz I am always amazed by people. How they conduct themselves. Are they shy? Awkward? Are they overcompensating for something? Are they just super cool people? I don't "people watch," per se. I just pick up on certain vibes and once I do pick up on a particular vibe, I become more attentive. Your work environment can feel a lot like high school sometimes. There will always be those who love to gossip, love to be the center of attention, and love to think they're too cool for everyone else (amongst other types). Believe it or not, there are still bullies in corporate America (and not just the rich big wigs). I remember in college when everyone thought they could start their lives over, in a sense and shake any reputation they carried in prior years that they weren't too fond of. But you are pretty much who you are and your "new" persona usually fades away eventually. I had a guy at work tell me recently, "I knew you were getting your promotion probably before you even knew." Really? Who in the hell does he know? Nobody, that's who! We have some new roles being filled at work now and the gossips will have their conspiracy theories once positions are filled. The worse thing you can do is agree with a fool! All they need is one person to go along with their foolish ideas or made up lies and they believe that they are justified. My goal is to always steer clear of the fools. I don't want to be associated with the gossips because in my view, they are the only uncool kids around. We must focus our energy lifting one another up. We must encourage our friends, family and coworkers alike. If you have time to spread rumors, you have time to look in the mirror and work on improving your situation. I have to believe it's pretty tough to do both. So next month I'll be 32 years old and my thought process hasn't changed when it comes to an environment similar to high school: I'd rather be the one being talked about than the one doing the talking. Hopefully I'll always be too busy handling my own business to be worried about some else's. |
Sunday, February 24, 2013
Ordinary People
Baxter's Buzz
Listen. Can you hear that? What thoughts run through your head in the middle of the night? What motivates you to wake up every morning? What is your inspiration?
"To have a reason to get up in the morning, it is necessary to possess a guiding principle..." Those words are the first on the first page of the book 'Ordinary People.' Although I always think this line is from 'Catcher In The Rye,' the line has always stuck with me, nonetheless.
I hear voices in my head. I relive powerful conversations from the past that encouraged me to want more in life than what I saw most in my neighborhood wanting. My friends and I talked big and dreamed even bigger. We compared our upbringing to what we wanted for our future children and decided to break cycles. We pushed each other to achieve things that wouldn't have been possible without the support system we created. With all of that being said, we as individuals must ultimately determine what path we want to take. And we as individuals must create a plan to ensure our path leads to our end goal.
I am, and have been for quite some time, walking in uncharted territory. My footsteps are fresh. Every step is measured, for I know not what lies ahead. I watch interviews and documentaries because I want to know how to set myself apart from the crowd. I want to know how a regular cat like me can achieve greatness. I want to learn what type of sacrifices were made and could they feel their momentum growing as they reached one seemingly unattainable goal after another. Because sometimes I feel that way. I think. What is their secret?
Who first told you that you were special? What did they say? Do you believe you're special? We're all just ordinary people with extraordinary capabilities. Will we ever realize our potential? Giving all-out effort is a talent. Most of us are just skating by, running at 50% effort, or less. Dedicating most of our efforts each day complaining, pointing fingers and avoiding work that may be just outside of our "duties" or job description.
You owe yourself more than that. You have more inside of you than throwing daily pity parties and watching all of the successful people on tv. Being great doesn't necessarily being famous, because we all know those two things don't always coincide.
I believe the more people that we can inspire, the more inspired we become. Surround yourself with those who want more from life and challenge each other to strive for even greater things. Laugh, smile and enjoy the journey. And don't be afraid to change paths is necessary.
Listen. Can you hear that? What thoughts run through your head in the middle of the night? What motivates you to wake up every morning? What is your inspiration?
"To have a reason to get up in the morning, it is necessary to possess a guiding principle..." Those words are the first on the first page of the book 'Ordinary People.' Although I always think this line is from 'Catcher In The Rye,' the line has always stuck with me, nonetheless.
I hear voices in my head. I relive powerful conversations from the past that encouraged me to want more in life than what I saw most in my neighborhood wanting. My friends and I talked big and dreamed even bigger. We compared our upbringing to what we wanted for our future children and decided to break cycles. We pushed each other to achieve things that wouldn't have been possible without the support system we created. With all of that being said, we as individuals must ultimately determine what path we want to take. And we as individuals must create a plan to ensure our path leads to our end goal.
I am, and have been for quite some time, walking in uncharted territory. My footsteps are fresh. Every step is measured, for I know not what lies ahead. I watch interviews and documentaries because I want to know how to set myself apart from the crowd. I want to know how a regular cat like me can achieve greatness. I want to learn what type of sacrifices were made and could they feel their momentum growing as they reached one seemingly unattainable goal after another. Because sometimes I feel that way. I think. What is their secret?
Who first told you that you were special? What did they say? Do you believe you're special? We're all just ordinary people with extraordinary capabilities. Will we ever realize our potential? Giving all-out effort is a talent. Most of us are just skating by, running at 50% effort, or less. Dedicating most of our efforts each day complaining, pointing fingers and avoiding work that may be just outside of our "duties" or job description.
You owe yourself more than that. You have more inside of you than throwing daily pity parties and watching all of the successful people on tv. Being great doesn't necessarily being famous, because we all know those two things don't always coincide.
I believe the more people that we can inspire, the more inspired we become. Surround yourself with those who want more from life and challenge each other to strive for even greater things. Laugh, smile and enjoy the journey. And don't be afraid to change paths is necessary.
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Fresh Start
Baxter's Buzz
I spoke with my little sister yesterday. She has been feeling neglected by most of her family recently, I haven't done a good job of correcting that. See, her and I are the youngest of my dad's children. Quite honestly, I'm sure me being born 31 years ago when my father's youngest at that time was 14 years old. So imagine all of ours surprise when my little sister was born 19 years ago when I was 13! I wanted to make sure that she didn't feel alienated like I did when I was young (truth be told, I still have my issues at 31 years old).
But while trying to find my way through life, I haven't been a good brother. My wife says she understands my point, but that I'm too hard on myself. She says, "How can you really extend yourself when you're still having issues at your age?"
She poses a great point, but I refuse to let myself off the hook that easily. I told my younger sister that I need to do better and she replied, "It's not too late to make a fresh start." Regardless of how I feel about my older siblings and what they've done or not done, I can only control my actions. Bottom line is: I need to do better. And I will. Not sure about it being a "fresh"start, but in many ways every day is a fresh start. Not what will I do with it?
R.I.P. to a classmate of mine who died suddenly this week. My prayers go out to you and your family.
I spoke with my little sister yesterday. She has been feeling neglected by most of her family recently, I haven't done a good job of correcting that. See, her and I are the youngest of my dad's children. Quite honestly, I'm sure me being born 31 years ago when my father's youngest at that time was 14 years old. So imagine all of ours surprise when my little sister was born 19 years ago when I was 13! I wanted to make sure that she didn't feel alienated like I did when I was young (truth be told, I still have my issues at 31 years old).
But while trying to find my way through life, I haven't been a good brother. My wife says she understands my point, but that I'm too hard on myself. She says, "How can you really extend yourself when you're still having issues at your age?"
She poses a great point, but I refuse to let myself off the hook that easily. I told my younger sister that I need to do better and she replied, "It's not too late to make a fresh start." Regardless of how I feel about my older siblings and what they've done or not done, I can only control my actions. Bottom line is: I need to do better. And I will. Not sure about it being a "fresh"start, but in many ways every day is a fresh start. Not what will I do with it?
R.I.P. to a classmate of mine who died suddenly this week. My prayers go out to you and your family.
Friday, February 22, 2013
Realignment
Baxter's Buzz
Last night, Wifey and I started to move some things around to get ready for our new arrival this spring. I have clothes in two different closets (if you know me, you're not surprised) with our baby coming, I need to consolidate to one closet. When you have new things enter your life, you have to make room for them. Sometimes making room for things involves making tough decisions. You may have to let go of a certain lifestyle, a certain habit or let go of certain people to allow others in. People and other things may enter your life for a season. Some seasons last longer, but most of them eventually end. Jimi Hendrix once said, "Castles made of sand fall in the sea, eventually."
Don't be afraid of your future. Embrace it. Don't be consumed by your past. You can take a peak in the rear-view mirror, but your eyes must be looking forward. It's the only way you can reach the goals that you have set for yourself. You can learn from the past. You can reference the past. You cannot, however, live in the past. Onward and upward!
Last night, Wifey and I started to move some things around to get ready for our new arrival this spring. I have clothes in two different closets (if you know me, you're not surprised) with our baby coming, I need to consolidate to one closet. When you have new things enter your life, you have to make room for them. Sometimes making room for things involves making tough decisions. You may have to let go of a certain lifestyle, a certain habit or let go of certain people to allow others in. People and other things may enter your life for a season. Some seasons last longer, but most of them eventually end. Jimi Hendrix once said, "Castles made of sand fall in the sea, eventually."
Don't be afraid of your future. Embrace it. Don't be consumed by your past. You can take a peak in the rear-view mirror, but your eyes must be looking forward. It's the only way you can reach the goals that you have set for yourself. You can learn from the past. You can reference the past. You cannot, however, live in the past. Onward and upward!
Monday, February 18, 2013
Relocation
Baxter's Buzz
Monday is my company's first day at our new location. Although I've only been with the company for just over a year, my life has changed so much in this short span. I'm working with some of the best people around. Not only do I get along with them at work, I've actually met folks that I consider to be my friends. Many of them came out to support my nonprofit when I had only been there for a few months and that really struck a cord with me. In addition to the career opportunity being awesome the people have literally changed my life.
What is a friend? I'm not sure if there is a static definition that is applicable for such a fluid topic. I'm not really sure where I'm heading with this, so just work with me. I am turning 32 years old this spring. I'm also expecting my first child around the same time. I haven't had much communication with some of the folks I consider my best friends recently. Are they not my friends anymore? I wouldn't say that, but what I would say is that our friendship has changed (changed dramatically, as a matter of fact). When I was young, I never imagined NOT growing old with the folks I shared so many of my fondest memories with as a child. Things change though. You have to be thankful for the memories you've shared with people and leave it at that. Nobody owes you any more. If you create more memories together, great, but don't feel that anyone owes you.
It is not fair to compare one friend to another. Relationship dynamics can be complicated and vary from person to person. There are a ton of people in the world who share some of your interests and who you can have great conversations with and share good times with. Will you ask them to stand up at your wedding? Maybe not. Just appreciate each great laugh, great conversation and overall great moment with anyone that you're fortunate enough to enjoy them with.
Monday is my company's first day at our new location. Although I've only been with the company for just over a year, my life has changed so much in this short span. I'm working with some of the best people around. Not only do I get along with them at work, I've actually met folks that I consider to be my friends. Many of them came out to support my nonprofit when I had only been there for a few months and that really struck a cord with me. In addition to the career opportunity being awesome the people have literally changed my life.
What is a friend? I'm not sure if there is a static definition that is applicable for such a fluid topic. I'm not really sure where I'm heading with this, so just work with me. I am turning 32 years old this spring. I'm also expecting my first child around the same time. I haven't had much communication with some of the folks I consider my best friends recently. Are they not my friends anymore? I wouldn't say that, but what I would say is that our friendship has changed (changed dramatically, as a matter of fact). When I was young, I never imagined NOT growing old with the folks I shared so many of my fondest memories with as a child. Things change though. You have to be thankful for the memories you've shared with people and leave it at that. Nobody owes you any more. If you create more memories together, great, but don't feel that anyone owes you.
It is not fair to compare one friend to another. Relationship dynamics can be complicated and vary from person to person. There are a ton of people in the world who share some of your interests and who you can have great conversations with and share good times with. Will you ask them to stand up at your wedding? Maybe not. Just appreciate each great laugh, great conversation and overall great moment with anyone that you're fortunate enough to enjoy them with.
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