Pleasure vs. Pain and the Price of Happiness

Baxter's Buzz

What is the price of happiness? That is the question that has to be answered individually. They say that pleasure is the absence of pain. What is your definition of pain? Once you determine that, you have a better idea of what you'd like to be removed from your life.

When I was young and single, I had an idea of the type of woman I wanted to be with. As I dated different women something strange happened: I developed a long list of what I DIDN'T want. And as the list of dislikes grew, I realized that my likes became more defined. The same can be said for jobs.

My wife and I got married at the beginning of the worst economic time in our lifetimes, so the fact that we both found jobs and have been working is a great blessing. My wife has faced a great deal of unprofessionalism at her current job and it has helped shape her idea of what she'd like in her next role. How do you know the type of person you want or don't want to be with, without having some experience dealing with that "type" of person. Some things seem ideal when you think about your work environment, but you truly don't know until...you know.

When I started my new role in November, it was definitely a lateral move. I gave up the comfort of going to a place that I was familiar with, where people knew me (Some even liked me), and where I REALLY had a grasp of the gig. When you think about those things, my move may seem like a step down in some ways. But the absence of pain in my current role has made it all worth it. I'd go as far as to say this role has been a step UP. My wife has decided it is time for her to move on from this role and I pray that in her next role, she'll experience a similar feeling. But hopefully with a little more money! Haha

Talent and Effort

Baxter's Buzz

I'm a big sports fan. I understand that these professional athletes are the best in the world. I was watching the Fab Five documentary on ESPN last night when I saw Grant Hill in his Duke jersey. I wondered if people remember how great of a player he was for his years in Detroit as a Piston.

He was blessed athletically, but he also was one of the hardest working guys, if not the hardest working guy. Of course injuries cost him many years so who knows how much better he would have become.

The one thing I know is that he showed up every year better than he was before. There were people nowhere near as talented as Hill but failed to get the most out of their talents. The same can be said for some who were more talented. "Leaving much more in the tank".

How can anyone allow a person who's naturally more gifted than them also out work them?

I feel that many guys in the NBA got the most out of their talent. Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Bill Russell, and John Stockon to name a few, squeezed everything they had out of the talent they were given. Some guys like Vince Carter, Shaq, Chris Webber, who were immensely talented, never "pushed it" to see how great they could truly be.

Do you push yourself on a daily basis to be great? Are you a talented slacker who is skating by on natural gifts alone? If so, why haven't you attempted to shoot for the stars? Are you an average talent who is always one step from being out the door because not only are you not the gifted, you're lazy?

Do you care about trying to make up the performance gap between you and your more talented coworkers? Do you plan to do anything different?

I know I haven't gotten the most out of my talent and it frustrates me to no end when I still have so much give. But at what point does potential go out the window and you just are who you are? When you go from a "coulda been" to a "never will be"?

EGO

Baxter's Buzz - 2 Months of Buzz - #20


I am an optimist. I always believe that things will work out. I am very "excitable" when it comes to things I'm involved in. You won't see me bouncing off the walls, but if my manager or my teammate is inspired and sharing that with me, I tend to be inspired as well.

But if you're blowing smoke up my behind and lying too much (I say too much because bosses always lie a lil bit), then I start to zone you out and you lose credibility with me.


Some people are not meant to work for others. They'll never work as hard as they should because they feel they should be getting a bigger slice of the pie. The problem is only a small number of THOSE people will actually go out and start businesses of their own. Most of them will float from job to job, thinking they're the smartest person in the room, with nothing to show for it. A small number will actually have the drive to start a business. And an even smaller number will have success in those businesses.


My wife was talking about work today and prefaced her comment with, "I hate to think that I have an ego but..." Ego is not always bad. Ego can push you to become the best in the department and ultimately get that promotion. Ego may propel you during presentation for the VP. Ego can force you out of a comfortable job because you feel like you deserve more. Don't get me wrong: Ego has gotten many people in trouble, but so has idleness and complacency.


You have to have balance, weighing pros and cons before making a huge decision. Deciding what the risks are versus the rewards. And of course, take time to pray and ask God to help lead you.

Weekend In Review

Baxter's Buzz - 2 Months of Buzz - #21


This weekend was pretty uneventful for the most part. I contemplated going to hang out for a friend's birthday party. I wasn't invited officially so there was nobody to call/text to say I wasn't coming. I talked to my brother and a friend of mine and decided to just relax with the wife. I slept well and woke up very late. Much later than usual. Started to think about the next few months and how I envisioned things happening.


I've been thinking about the non profit and scholarship that my friends and I discussed over a year ago. As you think about the immediate concerns that you have, it is difficult to draw up a plan to help others. Terribly difficult. I sat here all weekend and while I washed some dishes and did laundry, I tried to organize my thoughts and think of a way to breath life back into this scholarship project.


I've realized that focus for me involves: No television, no texting, and no twitter/facebook. I was able to finish studying for my test on Monday, however, this scholarship needs more time. I plan to spend more time this week on this endeavor. Have ideas? I'm open to them.

Baxter's Buzz - 2 Months of Buzz - #22


While I Was Here


The Lord told me that my day was coming


I'd be able to stand tall


Hard times has a way of numbing


Your senses where you don't feel at all


I'm appalled to think that I chose this life


I wanted what you wanted, a good job and a wife


Couple of kids. White picket fence


But when reality strikes, it strikes quick and don't miss


I made bad choices and here I am


God calling me saying it time to come with Him


But I said, "Lord if you give me another hour I'll dedicate that hour to you."


God told me that I had 7 more years, and if I fell off the path I wouldn't have that


So as I change lanes, I'm trying to keep my hands on the wheels


God forgives, but then gives us free will


But don't take His grace for granted find that balance


Try to do better. Try to repair damage


So as my time nears I have no fear


I just hope I made Him proud while I was here

Seasons of Change

Baxter's Buzz - 2 Months of Buzz - #19


Seasons of change can't be avoided
They called me paranoided because I planned for the worse
My fear is to work for a crew full of jerks
That waive power over your head like they're masters of the universe
When bills are overdue, the papers turn pink
They worry about private school tuition, you're washing clothes in the sink
You wanna stop existing and actually do some living
Walking, talking dead though we think we're doing more
Seasons are about to change for sure
When they change, it'll be for the best. But when they'll change again is anybody's guess

Holiday Party

Baxter's Buzz - 2 Months of Buzz - #22


I am down to the final stretch of blogging everyday and I am really happy to see all the people who have visited the site to check me out.


Today our holiday "party" was at a bowling alley..


I was talking to one of my new coworkers and realized that he was a big basketball (NBA) fan. I was really excited to know this, being that I enjoy myself some basketball too. Then came the bad news: Not only is he NOT a Detroit Pistons fan, he hates them! Not cool, but this could be an interesting winter.


He talked about how he follows another team and subscribes to the NBA cable package in order to follow them. It appeared that he has received a lot of flack from his friends because he had all of these great rationales for not following his local team. I thought it was kinda cool, although, I'm not sure if I could follow a team besides the Pistons if I lived in another state. I like other teams. I am a Kobe fan so I root for the Lakers, but I don't watch ALL of their games, but it would be less frustrating that the Pistons the past few years. Because I watch 95% of Pistons games.


I started to think what other team would I follow. That wouldn't be a bad idea if I could just find the right team. I'm not ready for the that though. I'll stick with my Pistons...for now anyway.

As I start to remember all of the new names and faces at the new job, I am gaining confidence. I am realizing that everyone leans on everyone there and nobody knows everything. The sooner I jump in, the sooner I can be one of the helpers and not the helpee.


Bowled for the first time in my life today. My score was 102. I wasn't the worst...by far. And the more regular bowlers told me I did good by breaking 100. Once I realized that I wasn't going to throw gutter balls, my competitiveness kicked in and I wanted to do well. I do believe that it won't take another 30 years for my next appearance.