I Want to be a Rock Star! Part 1

Buzz of the Day


The funny thing about this blog is: My mentality is very different than before I started blogging. I think that I'm a creative writer. Sometimes. One of the things that I haven't done much of lately is writing poetry. I thought that this site would give me an opportunity to share my poetry with the world. Problem is...I haven't felt the urge to write poetry since I've been blogging.

I am definitely a people person, but I am very private also. I don't want people all in my business, but I'm also protecting many people by keeping certain things to myself. This blog has allowed me to open up much more than I would to most people. For a long time, I didn't have an outlet like this so I wrote poetry. I'm confused because I don't know if the urge will return. I know that I am loving this site and I want to do more (creatively) for those that follow Baxter's Buzz.

These days, I can't even pick up a book if it is fiction. My wife loves fictional stories. That allows her to get away from reality. My getaway is sports. As a teen, I'd go and shoot hoops by myself when I had things on my mind. These days, I follow all of my Detroit sports (not as much hockey though), and that allows my mind to take a break. I still love to read. I just read self help books and magazines now. I'd rather read a recipe book than read a fictional book these days. The recipes can be applied to real life. I don't want to hear about some made up story. Give me an autobiography to read.

I think I've been worried about real life a lot lately.

Those of us who've just gotten married in the last 12-18 months have had a tough time. Marriage is hard enough, but the economy has turn up the heat on everything else. I have a new job, a new wife, baby talk, and a sales job in this terrible financial state that we're in. All of this stuff swirling around in my head can wear you down. I know I'm strong mentally. I can block most things out and do what I need to do, but sometimes it is tougher to do.

I am going to focus on taking a few steps back and enjoy myself a little more. I told you guys a while ago that I was going to share of fear of mine with you...I am afraid of failure.

Many of the people that I knew growing up were not "successful" in my eyes. People told me how smart I was and all this stuff, but it has taken me a long time to channel my energies on the correct goal and get that "tunnel vision" that people always speak of. I get it in spurts. But not long enough spurts! I am improving, but still struggling with this at my old age of 28.